It's Back Again

eyes are sweating and blurry
breathing heavy heartbeats racing
the milk of life the water of love
temptation arrives again with haste
pain stricken always pay the toll
forgive all hatred i tear into your life
come back to me once more
sacred property shown for my eyes only
why is it this way always stay late
time traveler of thursday
awake on the friday in wonder
i always make it out of this alive
but barely going running on basics
all functions will stop soon enough
i will watch the ceiling fade away
the sound of loved ones cries
as i ascend to whats next
what should i say where should i go
take control of this vessel
i'm ready for you now

When Will It?

from ashes to ashes
from dust to dust
the more my brain clashes
the more it will rust
the time my emotions bend
is the time my thoughts twist
love might be only a trend
but pain is on the list
feel a stabbing through my heart
my mind controls my vessel here
when are the good feelings going to start
my thought of you always ends in a tear

from ashes to ashes
from dust to dust
the more my mind stashes
the less i can trust
emotions drifting all to the end
i know my place i got the gist
hopefully one day my dark heart will mend
all situations end with a fist
the love is still there why did we part
lost it since then, nothing to fear
still walks away, what a nice piece of art
heart runs cold, no pilot, nothing to steer

What is it???

pretentious hollow actions
led to my bottoming out
irreverent encounter beyond brink
mind shattering point at vanity
blasphemous undertone of lies
break through the thickest layer
my mind hears beyond the common
it seems the manifestations are real
taken back by the lies of the precious
stuck, lost, bittersweet decisions
blast from the past we never made it last
heavens outspoken cries for lost love
please take me from the realm of the physical
please let the ride be over
or please wake me from this dream
or nightmare, or incubus, or reality
plus equals for a minus, let it be
unforgivable, unforgettable, could it be?

The Plunge

righteous actions of endless times
capitalizing on longing hate
relentless closure of ordained crimes
religious belief intensive care
hidden behind the blood soaked robe
into the sky with a cold stare
ending down onto the globe
unconscious fertility taking a dive
for all those who seek refuge
my tears will fall and lose its drive
but understand the ending will be huge
have faith but others don't seem to shine
having died once before it all
but i will never fall in line
cant hear the voice without a call

Son of Jakk

just when i thought it was over for me
you came into my life
when i looked into your eyes
i knew i now had a purpose
to want to make it through
to see another day
one day i will tell you
all that you need to know
to make it through this hard life
i wish i could be with you every
moment of every single day
my time away from you breaks me inside
but i know god will watch over you
because you are my legacy
i will love you forever
taken from me from dark choices
i will die to see you look into my eyes
the connection was there
and will be forever unique
you are my only reason to live
without you i wither away to dust
one day you will understand
why i lost you over lust
i will always find you
because a dad is not enough
so a father i will be......

Three

too much pain has passed my eyes
climbing up from the bottom i feel
ill never reach the top alone
looking for this light at the end of the tunnel
i keep hearing about but never see
when will it be my time
when will it be me
the past will haunt me until the end
i fear the solitude i face
will tear me piece by piece
until eternity's end or more
i awake and i feel numb
and sit and stare through my empty soul
day by day life is filled with tests
how many have i passed
how many have i failed
ill never love again til death
no one to hold ever again
no ones lips to watch
say those three destructive words

The Cruel

yoyo played emotions of lost love
temptations passion of loves past
giving in for one more taste of you
bringing back the thought it could be
rendering obsolete to the new void filler
sneaking, hiding, exciting, it's back
finally given purpose through you
what worth it was to have you close
now again i'm broken, shattered, and tainted
screaming inside for a chance to survive
expectations hollow, thinking what i've become
start once again, this time all alone
until i get my legacy by my side
i shake and i twitch, all with echoed cries
once a perfect match up for us
now the system hears our case in disgust
do not separate the one like a wishbone
for darkness and destruction with fall upon
not this time never seek the dark
your tiny smile will keep me waiting here
when can i teach you the cruelness of this world